32. The Blind Lady ~ 2nd July

I met a blind lady today called Julie. I was by myself in the hotel lounge making myself a cup of tea when I saw her sitting by herself. Her guide dog gave it away. I walked over to her and asked her if I could stroke her dog because it had a coat on which said something along the lines of 'working dog, do not distract'. I ended up sitting by the lady and we had a long conversation about all sorts of things. I don't know how it came into conversation, but I revealed I was deaf. She was asking me questions, wanting to know more. I briefly summarised that I had perfect hearing and then unexpectedly lost my hearing within two months earlier this year.

"Do you have those hearing things in your ears?"

"Can you do that thing with your hands?" she asked, imitating sign language with her hands. "Are your parents deaf? Do you just have deaf friends? You're very young to be deaf aren't you?" Her questions went on and on as though she needed to know everything about me. I didn't have the same need to hear about her history, just her dog!

When I first started my blog, you may recall that I wrote about being so thankful to have my sight despite the fact I was losing my hearing and I have never doubted that since. However Julie told me how lucky we both are as we have both had our sight / hearing for a period of our lives (she became blind in her early forties) and I agreed with her. Julie then said that she had already built an image of me in her head and she could only do that because she remembers what things looked like. I am ashamed for feeling this way but I actually felt envious of her because contrary to what she believed I can't remember sounds. I know that a bird makes a 'tweet-tweet' noise but I can't remember the actual noises. She could create an image of me whether accurate or not, whereas I can't create noises in my head. 

Despite me being able to remember things said by close relatives who have passed away, I cannot actually hear their voice. Whist all the hearing people I have spoken to about not remembering sounds and voices have the same problem as I do, there are people who claim to remember the actual noise years later.

Despite meeting Julie just a few hours ago and having just written about her, it has just dawned on me that I can no longer hear her voice anymore.